人蛇大战香港版彭丹

作者:拓跋继旺
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人蛇大战香港版彭丹  'Miss Eyre, are you ill?' said Bessie.

  'Far from it. I was tormented by the contrast between my idea andmy handiwork: in each case I had imagined something which I wasquite powerless to realise.'人蛇大战香港版彭丹  Thus relieved of a grievous load, I from that hour set to workafresh, resolved to pioneer my way through every difficulty: Itoiled hard, and my success was proportionate to my efforts; mymemory, not naturally tenacious, improved with practice; exercisesharpened my wits; in a few weeks I was promoted to a higher class; inless than two months I was allowed to commence French and drawing. Ilearned the first two tenses of the verb Etre, and sketched my firstcottage (whose walls, by the bye, outrivalled in slope those of theleaning tower of Pisa), on the same day. That night, on going tobed, I forgot to prepare in imagination the Barmecide supper of hotroast potatoes, or white bread and new milk, with which I was wontto amuse my inward cravings: I feasted instead on the spectacle ofideal drawings, which I saw in the dark; all the work of my own hands:freely pencilled houses and trees, picturesque rocks and ruins,Cuyp-like groups of cattle, sweet paintings of butterflies hoveringover unblown roses, of birds picki

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ases, and costumes, and preferences, andantipathies- such was what I knew of existence. And now I felt that itwas not enough; I tired of the routine of eight years in oneafternoon. I desired liberty; for liberty I gasped; for liberty Iuttered a prayer; it seemed scattered on the wind then faintlyblowing. I abandoned it and framed a humbler supplication; for change,stimulus: that petition, too, seemed swept off into vague space:'Then,' I cried, half desperate, 'grant me at least a new servitude!'

  'Are you happy here?'

  'Do you feel as if you should sleep, Miss?' asked Bessie, rathersoftly.

  I was stiff with long sitting, and bewildered with the noise andmotion of the coach: gathering my faculties, I looked about me.Rain, wind, and darkness filled the air; nevertheless, I dimlydiscerned a wall before me and a door open in it; through this doorI passed with my new guide: she shut and locked it behind her. Therewas now visible a house or houses- for the building spread far- withmany windows, and lights burning in some; we went up a broad pebblypath, splashing wet, and were admitted at a door; then the servant ledme through a passage into a room with a fire, where she left me alone.

d her wishes; not unfrequently tore andspoiled her silk attire; and he was still 'her own darling.' I daredcommit no fault: I strove to fulfil every duty; and I was termednaughty and tiresome, sullen and sneaking, from morning to noon, andfrom noon to night.

  In the clear embers I was tracing a view, not unlike a picture Iremembered to have seen of the castle of Heidelberg, on the Rhine,when Mrs. Fairfax came in, breaking up by her entrance the fierymosaic I had been piecing together, and scattering too some heavyunwelcome thoughts that were beginning to throng on my solitude.

  He ran headlong at me: I felt him grasp my hair and my shoulder: hehad closed with a desperate thing. I really saw in him a tyrant, amurderer. I felt a drop or two of blood from my head trickle down myneck, and was sensible of somewhat pungent suffering: these sensationsfor the time predominated over fear, and I received him in franticsort. I don't very well know what I did with my hands, but he calledme 'Rat! Rat!' and bellowed out aloud. Aid was near him: Eliza andGeorgiana had run for Mrs. Reed, who was gone upstairs: she now cameupon the scene, followed by Bessie and her maid Abbot. We were parted:I heard the words-

  In the clear embers I was tracing a view, not unlike a picture Iremembered to have seen of the castle of Heidelberg, on the Rhine,when Mrs. Fairfax came in, breaking up by her entrance the fierymosaic I had been piecing together, and scattering too some heavyunwelcome thoughts that were beginning to throng on my solitude.

  'But he has no family.'

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  'And cross and cruel,' I added; but Helen Burns would not admitmy addition: she kept silence.
  'I am very happy, Jane; and when you hear that I am dead, youmust be sure and not grieve: there is nothing to grieve about. Weall must die one day, and the illness which is removing me is notpainful; it is gentle and gradual: my mind is at rest. I leave noone to regret me much: I have only a father; and he is lately married,and will not miss me. By dying young, I shall escape great sufferings.I had not qualities or talents to make my way very well in theworld: I should have been continually at fault.'
  Something of vengeance I had tasted for the first time; as aromaticwine it seemed, on swallowing, warm and racy: its after-flavour,metallic and corroding, gave me a sensation as if I had been poisoned.Willingly would I now have gone and asked Mrs. Reed's pardon; but Iknew, partly from experience and partly from instinct, that was theway to make her repulse me with double scorn, thereby re-excitingevery turbulent impulse of my nature.…
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